sometimes I feel myself the only one loser. what's that I dunno.. complexes and coplications live inside of me. I wanna stop it.
but anyway I keep going.
I keep going with learning, watching, learning, making notices, coming to the conclusions.
I am so alive like I never was never before.
I learn to live here and now.
it's hard sometimes but the thing should be remembered is do what you have to and want to NOW. don't put off any fucking thing for tomorrow or ever. tomorrow never comes. it is always only today.
yep.
вторник, 23 марта 2010 г.
вторник, 16 марта 2010 г.
days 19-28
feelings are inside my head.
Tu deviens responsable pour toujours de ce que tu as apprivoisé.
oh yes fucking bitch.
yes, I do my homework and other wholesome things but..
I dreamed about eventful life - okay, here you are! and what's now? now I dream about doing nothing but reading and movie watching.
but to be hotest
ahhaha to be honest I meant
but to be honest I want to meet Someone to Love and to have a serious and great relationship.
but I haven't got any time for it woahhaha.
very funny.
Tu deviens responsable pour toujours de ce que tu as apprivoisé.
oh yes fucking bitch.
yes, I do my homework and other wholesome things but..
I dreamed about eventful life - okay, here you are! and what's now? now I dream about doing nothing but reading and movie watching.
but to be hotest
ahhaha to be honest I meant
but to be honest I want to meet Someone to Love and to have a serious and great relationship.
but I haven't got any time for it woahhaha.
very funny.
воскресенье, 7 марта 2010 г.
суббота, 6 марта 2010 г.
days 14-17
I'm More.
I'm more than anything, more then anyone.
ja more.
"more" in russian means "see", u know.
& my name's translated from latin the same way.)
I'm more than anything, more then anyone.
ja more.
"more" in russian means "see", u know.
& my name's translated from latin the same way.)
понедельник, 1 марта 2010 г.
day 13
I can't take this anymore.
I forget what I have to remember to become Someone.
I'm so unprotected, helpless and so fckn' on
I know the only one source of my-Power is me.
but
Sometimes my hands go to seed.
I suppose it's just temporary but every this shit so drops me now.
hey c'mooon Gather yourself together, a rag!!!
I forget what I have to remember to become Someone.
I'm so unprotected, helpless and so fckn' on
I know the only one source of my-Power is me.
but
Sometimes my hands go to seed.
I suppose it's just temporary but every this shit so drops me now.
hey c'mooon Gather yourself together, a rag!!!
воскресенье, 28 февраля 2010 г.
days 10/11/12
oooooooh what the fuuuck.
don't know anything.
what should I do or smth
okay it's temporary but piss me off. and take out
la
lalalala
don't know anything.
what should I do or smth
okay it's temporary but piss me off. and take out
la
lalalala
четверг, 25 февраля 2010 г.
day 9
I'm afraid after my decision this blog turns up a-housewife-bloggy)))
for ex., today I cooked cookies with curds hoho)
& I was really good 'cuz I tried to be kiiind person.
okayokay
to do not make this post some kind of stupid,
it's meee
for ex., today I cooked cookies with curds hoho)
& I was really good 'cuz I tried to be kiiind person.
okayokay
to do not make this post some kind of stupid,
it's meee
среда, 24 февраля 2010 г.
days 7/8
what can I say one week later?
I can say my goal was & is to reach harmony. others are just different ways to deal with it.
1,5 years I have got a problem. I don't make myself happy.
unhealthy perfectionism makes me a slave of itself.
& my bottle is always half-empty..
now I'm staying somewhere where I can find myself, feelself, loveself.
what do I do? I learn languages, improve my beauty, knowledges and soul.
Meditations & yoga help me.
I gonna go my own way.
I can say my goal was & is to reach harmony. others are just different ways to deal with it.
1,5 years I have got a problem. I don't make myself happy.
unhealthy perfectionism makes me a slave of itself.
& my bottle is always half-empty..
now I'm staying somewhere where I can find myself, feelself, loveself.
what do I do? I learn languages, improve my beauty, knowledges and soul.
Meditations & yoga help me.
I gonna go my own way.
вторник, 23 февраля 2010 г.
day 6
I'm not sure now if I need all this.
I'm not sure if I need to be famous. often I think only non self-dependent persons need this. to make other people understand "I'm important!".
it's a bullshit.
what I want is to know much about fashion & to look great.
I'm learn now chakras & it makes me confident about my opinion.
hm.
time will show.
I'm not sure if I need to be famous. often I think only non self-dependent persons need this. to make other people understand "I'm important!".
it's a bullshit.
what I want is to know much about fashion & to look great.
I'm learn now chakras & it makes me confident about my opinion.
hm.
time will show.
понедельник, 22 февраля 2010 г.
days 4/5
something fucking are happening now in my head.
I try to сope with it.
but always remember for what I'm here.
you know, it's all not only about fashion stuff.
nonono, it's much MUUCH more!
it's how to deal with yourself, with everything's around you.
I can do it. yes, I do can.
I try to сope with it.
but always remember for what I'm here.
you know, it's all not only about fashion stuff.
nonono, it's much MUUCH more!
it's how to deal with yourself, with everything's around you.
I can do it. yes, I do can.
суббота, 20 февраля 2010 г.
day 3rd
ohhoho, it's soo pity I haven't write yesterday anything.. 1stly, I had a party and was too bisy.. 2ndly, I haven't done anything important. to read some chapters of "the nature and impact of fashion" is not on the map to my mind.
but today I hope will become much more effective!
but today I hope will become much more effective!
четверг, 18 февраля 2010 г.
day 2nd
is it really only the second day of my programm? omg I feel it's forever with me. & when I imagine I haven't got it, I feel SOO MUCH emptiness, sadness and useless!
how could I live without a goal?
today I was so bisy, but made a small step closer to my Dream - now I'm reading the Encyclopedia of the nature and impact of fashion. without any foundation really good judgement is impossible I suppose. so no problem, it will be created.
tomorrow besides reading I'm going to do some routine work with papers and so on.
see you.
how could I live without a goal?
today I was so bisy, but made a small step closer to my Dream - now I'm reading the Encyclopedia of the nature and impact of fashion. without any foundation really good judgement is impossible I suppose. so no problem, it will be created.
tomorrow besides reading I'm going to do some routine work with papers and so on.
see you.
среда, 17 февраля 2010 г.
day 1st
hi guys, today I started the way to my Goal.
to say truth It isn't just a ticket for PFW'11 F/W haha.
no, but It is to become a Fashion Icon. so what does "fashion icon" mean?
I guess when every Fashion House's excited about the presence of you on its show you are the FI. that's why my formal aim is the invitation you-know-where.
it's not only about being a great-looking person. but it is about your influence. whatever you do you have to make fashion.
so, today was a big day!
because I decided to learn French & had the 1st lesson. =)) I'm absolutly agitated about it)
then, I bought some stuff for my future new looks (now it's too cold for beautiful clothes, that's why I don't like winter so much). surely, I'll show it you, but later.
it's a pity I didn't read anything about fashion history, but that's what I'm going to do tomorrow.
oh I forgot about something important!
my achievement programm!
1stly - to learn the history of fashion quickly. yeah, unfortunately my knowledge will be rather superficial but it's so for the first time. I want to improve myself right along. but anyway I need the Base.
2ndly - to improve my style. you will see it I hope)
3dly - to improve my photo skills as a photographer and as a model. I want to shoot a Street Fashion.
it's only for the first three month. so before the summer, I have to become pretty discriminative in fashion.
tomorrow I'm going to start exploring Google to take some knowledge.
so, see you soon!)
to say truth It isn't just a ticket for PFW'11 F/W haha.
no, but It is to become a Fashion Icon. so what does "fashion icon" mean?
I guess when every Fashion House's excited about the presence of you on its show you are the FI. that's why my formal aim is the invitation you-know-where.
it's not only about being a great-looking person. but it is about your influence. whatever you do you have to make fashion.
so, today was a big day!
because I decided to learn French & had the 1st lesson. =)) I'm absolutly agitated about it)
then, I bought some stuff for my future new looks (now it's too cold for beautiful clothes, that's why I don't like winter so much). surely, I'll show it you, but later.
it's a pity I didn't read anything about fashion history, but that's what I'm going to do tomorrow.
oh I forgot about something important!
my achievement programm!
1stly - to learn the history of fashion quickly. yeah, unfortunately my knowledge will be rather superficial but it's so for the first time. I want to improve myself right along. but anyway I need the Base.
2ndly - to improve my style. you will see it I hope)
3dly - to improve my photo skills as a photographer and as a model. I want to shoot a Street Fashion.
it's only for the first three month. so before the summer, I have to become pretty discriminative in fashion.
tomorrow I'm going to start exploring Google to take some knowledge.
so, see you soon!)
вторник, 16 февраля 2010 г.
day X
hi everyone.
my name is Marina, I'm 18 and here i'm not just for fun.
i've decided to change my life. and now I have a Goal.
this blog is one of the way to achieve it, and besides it was created for self-control.
so.
today I've decided what I want to get.
I want to get invited to Paris Fashion Week Fall/Winter 2011. Chanel, Dior, Balenciaga, Celine and so on, you know.
I haven't got influentional parents, money for luxury products or any fundamental knowledge in history of fashion. I'm a white paper.
but I have got the Internet to obtain information, my individuality, opinion and Nikon D100 to become famous, and I'm crazy about my Idea, my Dream, my Aim, my Purpose.
what I'm going to do you will know from this blog.
in the course of year every day I will tell you about my steps to get what I want.
there will be no less than 366 posts.
so, that's all now.
and remember:
only I know what I can.
my name is Marina, I'm 18 and here i'm not just for fun.
i've decided to change my life. and now I have a Goal.
this blog is one of the way to achieve it, and besides it was created for self-control.
so.
today I've decided what I want to get.
I want to get invited to Paris Fashion Week Fall/Winter 2011. Chanel, Dior, Balenciaga, Celine and so on, you know.
I haven't got influentional parents, money for luxury products or any fundamental knowledge in history of fashion. I'm a white paper.
but I have got the Internet to obtain information, my individuality, opinion and Nikon D100 to become famous, and I'm crazy about my Idea, my Dream, my Aim, my Purpose.
what I'm going to do you will know from this blog.
in the course of year every day I will tell you about my steps to get what I want.
there will be no less than 366 posts.
so, that's all now.
and remember:
only I know what I can.
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